rest

Its amazing how much GOOD a vacation can do for one's well being. I was in a crazy winter funk this new year, and was beginning to feel like everything was spinning out of control. School was unbearable, family was untouchable, friends were impossible, life was just grey and gross. Despite how many good people I know here, I was definately feeling isolated, even oppressed, stagnant, and in need of rejeuvenation. I was getting sick alot, got into a car accident (fender bender but uncharicteristic nonetheless) and skipping classes out of apathy and anxiety.

After my tax return came in and I found myself with plenty in my savings account, I experienced some intense frustration in my life. Frustration borne of individuals, school, stress, all bundled into one soul-sucking headache. I was trying to lift my spirits by listening to Ben Harper Fight for Your Mind on my iTunes, and "Brown Eyed Blues" came on. This song has the immediate benefits of always making me dance, but this time it additionally brought to mind my dear friend Kristin, who lives in Kona, who always had the same affect on me when we worked together in Seattle at Mrs. Cooks. At that moment I realized I needed to take her up on what she had been offering me for the past 6 years - a visit to Kona with free lodging at the Klassert B&B.

Within a few short days I had my tickets booked for Spring Break. I didn't know what to expect, I had never been to Hawaii, I just knew I needed to 1) be away from Louisville, 2) be somewhere warm, 3) be around good people, and 4) get out of my head for a while. Four weeks dragged by, but before I knew it I was in the air on my way to Kona.

The trip there flew by despite my bad seats (middle seats most of the way there). Read all of Willa Cather's Song of the Lark, and Cretien de Troye's Arthurian Romances .I arrived in Kona at 9:30pm. I didn't know the plane was landing until I felt the wheels bounce off the tarmac. Hawaii is SO dark at night, hardly any city or street lights at all, it was surreal landing. Kristin and Kyle picked me up promptly, slung a beautiful lei around my neck and drove me to their home.

I met Olive, their 2 year old black lab, best dog ever. The next morning I was pleased to not experience jet lag what-so-ever. Well, aside from waking up at 6:30, but that didn't change much the entire week. The glorious sun and cacophany of singing birds woke me up, and told my body what time it was, and I needed no further adjustment from that.

Day one (official), Kristin and Kyle took me on a cupcake delivery, (Kristin has a small business, making and delivering cupcakes, she's pretty fantastic!), then we swung by the local "good" farmer's market. Beautiful. We stocked up on coconut candy, coffee, liliko'i (local passionfruit), veggies for dinner, and sampled various local goods. Kristin and I bought bouganvillia leis for our big day before we headed back home.

Big day? What big day? Our big day was 1) it was Kristin's birthday! and 2) it was the annual, great Kona Brewfest. Cause for much excitement around the island. Now this was the cause of some conflict for me. For the previous 2 months I had been completely alcohol free for personal reasons. I had felt great about that too, so I was conflicted between the desire to participate in Brewfest and the desire to keep up the good work I had been doing in sobriety. Eventually I decided to have a drink or two, just not to overdo it, and to see how I did with "social drinking."

Well let me tell you, it was a damn BALL. So much fun. The place was packed, beautiful, with tons of vendors from restaurants and breweries all over Hawaii and the US, sampling food and beers all gratis with the price of our tickets ($50). I drank for about half the time of the event (4 hours), but switched to water after a while when I felt I was starting to get uncomfortable with my alcohol level. This was good, as I wound up driving our group home.

The crowd was wild, there were some real characters there. We all strove to get pictures of the "she-mullet", (see below.) Impressive, no? At the start of Brewfest, it was crowded, and everyone just stared at the various characters who came out for the festivities while carefully avoiding eye contact and trying to be polite and not bump into each other. By the end, everyone was merrily jostling each other and loudly crying out, "Hey Shark-guy!" and "Hey Beer-hat guy!", as the jolly-atmosphere cumulated and beer-taps ran dry.

All in all it was a fabulous venture, I'm glad I participated, and even MORE glad that I abstained from over-partaking in the brews. The last thing I wanted was a vicious hangover on my vacation!

After we got home, Brewfest turned into Winefest! Kristin is a wine-distributor for the island, and also works in a wine shop. So she has a fabulous collection and a fabulous taste for it. Before we left for Brewfest we decided that that night would be our St. Patty's Day celebration and put some corned beef and cabbage in the crock pot. It was ready when we barreled our way into the house after the Fest, and as we prepared our dinner, Kristin started picking out wines to have with it. We drank some crisp white wine while preparing dinner, then my absolute favorite pairing ever was made. With our corned beef and cabbage, Kristin's inebriated mug chose to serve a nice rose champagne. It was delicious, if not a slightly unusual choice! So much fun, so much laughing...

Sunday was recovery day. Kristin and I joined up with her best friend Maggie, and we all went to an amazing black sand beach at Kiholo Bay. I reapplied my sunscreen frequently, like a good girl, and went home sunburn free. We spent the day lazily throwing the ball for Olive into the surf, and watching whales breach on the horizon.

Kristin decided to randomly swing by a different beach on the way home, Kua Bay. We got there and were promptly treated to a scene of impressive and CLOSE whales jumping and diving. Naturally they evaded my best attempts at capturing them on camera, but it was fantastic nonetheless.

Monday morning Maggie came by and gave me a 2.5 hour massage. She is a wonderful massage therapist with a real intuitive knack for her practice. She has a very comfortable vibe that allows one to relax, and she brings the massage experiece to you, so that you're fully at-ease and without concern about being somewhere different. No worrying about driving home or anything. 2.5 hours. Damn. It was fabulous, and I was as loose as a goose the rest of the day.

Tuesday I went adventuring, driving up to Waimea where relatives of old family friends own a tiny restaurant called "Hawaiian Style Cafe" which was filling and cheap. I could seriously live in that town or area, its very green and lush. My adventures continued on to Pololu, an amazing area that is on a far tip of the island. (Pics below). I stayed, meditated, and took some great pictures before continuing on to Hawi, where the patriarch of the same family friends was born. Good old Walter Ching, the whole family is fantastic. I picked up some souvenirs in Hawi before continuing on around the loop that would take me back to Kona. All in all a mellow road trip around North Kohala that was nice and relaxing.

Embarrassingly, I got my first mild sunburn of the trip on that drive, I didn't reapply my sunscreen like I knew I should have... driving in a convertible with the top down around Hawaii will do that to a fair redhead.

During the week I started and finished reading Augustin Burrough's "Dry", quite an interesting read for someone jostling with sobriety (made me realize it really isn't that bad of a problem for me.. really...), and started "Twilight" much to my horror (still not finished though. And that's ok.)

I'll end this for now, trying to capture an entire trip in one blog post is... overwhelming. For the writer AND the reader, I would imagine.

films

So arising out of an achingly long period of watching DVDs of tv shows (Six Feet Under, Dexter, Deadwood, Lost, etc.), I have begun watching movies again. I must say that I have seen some exceptional ones.

The Hurt Locker - This was the first one I watched. It left me shaken and scattered, my brain working at 100 miles per hour to overcome the effect it left on me. I don't know if it rustled up some of my PTSD or what, but I thought this movie was really great. There were some Hollywoodized parts that I really disliked, but overall I was impressed. My favorite Marines that I worked with were the EOD team in my first unit. I ran into the Gunny from that team during later deployments and he was just a great person to have around. Maybe this movie just reminded me of him, his team, and how much I admired them. Whatever it is, it is scarily realistic at times.

The End of the Line - due to my new job in seafood I have had a piqued interest in the state of our oceans. This is a GREAT documentary that deals directly with that - overfishing, damaged ecosystems, the woes of fish farming, the effect of corporations fishing in underdeveloped countries' waters, and more. Everyone needs to be educated, and this is great place to start. Next time you hear someone comment on the bluefin tuna they had for dinner last week, you will want to punch them in the face.

Up In the Air - I didn't enjoy this movie as much as I thought I would. I like the actress with the crazy name who stars opposite George Clooney, that's about it.

District 9 - I really liked this movie for the statement it makes on refugees. Not on aliens, not on South Africa and Nigeria, but on refugees. Refugees are dehumanized, pathologized, and hated by the communities who they reach out to. This movie nails that. All the rest I could do without.

More to come.

be still

Its amazing how accurate our intuition can be - dreams, fugue-state revelations, its amazing. I truely believe everyone carries some level of ESP-like future-reading skills, some just are more connected to it than others. Maybe its almost like a form of self-preservation, our intuitions and instincts kicking in for protection. Interesting.

My neck is stiffening up from the bender the other night - I'm suprised I don't have more whip-lash, guess I'm just lucky. ttthhhbbbpppffft.

Last Chance, Texaco

"Boy From Tupelo" Emmylou Harris. One of my favorite songs ever.

Last night, driving home from work I was involved in an annoyingly minor car accident. Is it a law in Kentucky that all accidents, no matter how minor, must be reported to the police? The guy I rear-ended immediately called 911 even though all I did was bump his bumper (ok, I left a considerable 1.5" dent in the thing). So what could have been a 5 minute swapping of insurance information and phone numbers turned into an hour long ordeal at 11pm, after a long day. I was literally falling asleep in my car as I waited for the police officer to file the report and check our licences and registrations. Luckily he was laid back and friendly, but unfortunately my insurance card was expired and I got a ticket, turning a potentially one hour long situation into a multiple day long ass pain that will require me to go to the station and give them my proof of insurance letter that I have to get to negate the ticket I got for not having any. All this because some asshole was driving at 10:15pm with his headlights off.

No one was hurt, except my car's interior, which suffered from an exploding bottle of flying kombucha and an opened container of garlic green beans. The smell is... formidable.

So I've got that going for me.

My current playlist -

Neil Young, Harvest Moon
Van Morrison, Crazy Love
Emmylou Harris, Boy from Tupelo
Emmylou Harris, Red Dirt Girl
Emmylou Harris, Blackhawk
Neil Young, Heart of Gold
Ben Harper, With My Own Two Hands
Joe Cocker, Feelin' Alright
Emmylou Harris, Waltz Across Texas Tonight
Neil Young, Old Man
Ben Harper, Diamonds on the Inside
Warren Zevon, Keep Me in Your Heart
Neil Young, Unknown Legend
Emmylous Harris, Pancho and Lefty
King Harvest, Dancing in the Moonlight
Van Morrison, Into the Mystic
Patty Griffin, Little Fire

This is constantly evolving, I might have to add more Patty Griffin, some Elton John, or even Lucinda Williams. The sunshine does magical things to my music.

As I rise from my recent funk of being sick, missing school, being in a car accident, and the winter, I wonder what directions my winds will take me in. I feel that change is coming. With Hawaii, then school finishing for the semester, then Morocco and summer, I feel that by August I will hardly recognize myself. It is time for me to secure my foundation and brace myself for the onslaught.

With reading huge quantities of Willa Cather for school, listening to Emmylou Harris and Neil Young, and craving open spaces and sunshine I have found myself craving a road trip across the midwest again. The open road, the sun beating down, just me and the radio, the fields, plains, winds, bridges, and constantly shifting landscape, I miss it and crave it.

(What is it about 'Heart of Gold' that is so fabulous?)

That's enough for a Saturday morning.